Sunday, May 31, 2009

Buzzwords and Gobblty Gook

I have been following the many events regarding marriage equlity and protections for transgender people. I have looked at both sides of the issues. The excuses given for denying people their rights are pretty lame ones at that.

My question is why is it so important to our foes that we all be straight? I'm perfectly happy as a transgender person. I have long made it a point not to be defined by anyone else.

Our foes have enacted the Defense of Marriage Act because they believe that they are saving it from oblivion. Well, marriage has survived many social upheavals. If they are so interested in 'saving' marriage why not work with the couples struggling with their marriages? Recently, I celebrated my 29th anniversary. My spouse and I love each other, respect one another, and enjoy being with each other. She knows that I am transgender and it has made us even closer.

Other buzz words are 'traditional marriage' and 'traditional values'. What's traditional in one culture may be something totally different in another culture. I am for traditional marriage but I am also for equality. Denying gay and lesbian couples the right to marry is wrong, plain and simple.

It has come to the point where I'm tired of people trying to tell me how I should live. The gender binary system is another control mechanism that has been the bane of transgender people. I will touch upon this in a future post because I have much to say about it.

to be continued...........


Friday, May 29, 2009


I didn't choose to be transgender, but I did choose to embrace that I am transgender.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

New Discoveries

I just finished reading Vanessa Sheridan's book "Crossing Over" for the second time. It's amazing what I missed from the first time that I read the book. While I know the struggle for transgender equality is difficult, I see now how entrenched many of our institutions  are and so amandantly opposed to us securing our rights. It opens up a can of worms that, quite frankly, needs to be opened up.

The book confirms some of my own personal feelings and transformations when I discovered my transgender identity. We were created exactly as God planned it. What has been done to transgender people over the centuries is heinous and blasphemous. Sadly, the institutional church was behind much of the bigotry transgender suffered and still suffer.

When I accepted my transgenderism, I did not feel shame or guilt. I felt liberation and completeness. In the coming days, I will share some thoughts about what I discovered and my feelings about what I read.


Friday, May 22, 2009


I may not have had the same experiences as you,
but I rejoice when you have attained a victory.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Desire To Be More Open

My desire to be out in public is stronger this year. It's not to draw attention to myself or fame but to educate the public about transgender people. I have gone to the laundry dressed the past few times I've done the wash. I went food shopping recently. On Thursday I will be going to a movie with a lesbian friend.

I'm saying all this because my transgender journey is taking me to the point that I desire to share more of myself. It's to educate the public and it's to encourage other transgender and gender variant folks that we are being ourselves. There's nothing wrong with us and we have nothing to be ashamed of. I have reasoned that no one will force me into the closet.

I'm not sure if or when it will happen but I have the desire to live as a woman 24/7. I have a spouse to consider. She accepts my crossdressing though, at times, she doesn't understand why I like wearing women's clothing.She has purchased clothing for me and we share skirts, blouses, tops, dresses and coats. I let her borrow my jewelry when she needs it. Guess I have the best of both worlds.

I have come to see that I do not relish conventional wisdom or the status quo like I used to. I see that people possess much more than the gender roles they are assigned. If I told my non-transgender friends about 'Gennee', they would be shocked. My goal is to become an educator. I always believed that the setting I'll be in will not be a traditional one. I look forward to the day when I can share my life as a transgender person to many people.


Sunday, May 17, 2009

Ever Changing Landscape

Today I attended a meeting of tglb vets at the community center. After the meeting I was observing the people walking or sitting down. The thought came to my mind that each person is at a different stage in their lives and in varying degrees. Like crossdressing not being a neutral activity, the transgender journey is not a stationary trek. The landscape changes all the time.


Friday, May 15, 2009

Flowers of The World

Lately I have read numerous posts about GLBT folks coming to terms with who they are. It encourages me to hear this because many others will be encouraged by their discovery and self-acceptance. 

It's sad how society discriminates against people who do not represent the 'right presentation' of gender. Transgender and gender variant people have long felt the wrath of a very restrictive and soul-killing binary construct. So have effeminate men and masculine women. Diversity is like a flower garden. There's so many colors, varieties, sizes, and shapes Each person adds beauty to life's tapestry. 

I wish that I could hug the people who have accepted themselves. I feel so blessed privileged to be part of a beautiful community of people who desire to live authentic lives.  To my brothers and sisters, I encourage you to live life on your terms and love being who you are.


We were created as God wants us. We are not a mistake. We are part of his diversity.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Uniquely Created

While I have been research material for an upcoming talk, I have seen how the contributions of transgender and gender variant people have been suppressed throughout history. We belie the long held belief that there are on two genders that exist.  We have existed since the very beginning of life.

I will be presenting a historical overview in the next few posts. I was struck by the thought that we are at a time where we can change the course of history. Transgender topics are beginning to be discussed openly and that's great. It is also a time when our opponents are leveling both barrels at us to get us to submit to their lies and deception. I am proud to be a transgender person because I was created this way. 

This is the crossroad that may be crossing because I can't let lies, misinformation, and fear intimidate and hurt my transgender brothers and sisters. I will be digging deeper into the history and I will pass along my findings

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Article about Equality & Justice Day In Albany

The Curvature, USA

Equality and Justice for Whom?

Last Tuesday, I attended Equality & Justice Day in Albany.  It is the LGBT
lobby day for
New York, run by the Empire State Pride Agenda.  I generally
had a good time, and was glad that I attended to show my support.

But I also noticed something throughout the day that, while I may not be in
the best position to do so as a straight and cis person, seemed to me to
deserve a strong critique.

I wrote earlier that the main bill I am concerned about seeing pass is
http://thecurvature .com/2009/ 04/27/in- support-of- genda/> The Gender
Expression Non-Discrimination Act would protect people from discrimination
on the basis of gender identity and expression in the areas of employment,
housing, credit, and more.  Right now, in New York, no such protections
exist for trans or otherwise identifying gender variant people — despite the
fact that such protections are in place (as they obviously should be) on the
basis of sexual orientation.

Last year after Equality & Justice Day, I was surprised and pleased to see
that GENDA, while it did not ever reach the Senate floor with Republicans in
charge, was given seemingly equal attention to marriage equality and
http://www.prideage plained/Youthand SafeSchools/ QuickFacts/ AnswerstoCommonQ uestions/ tabid/228/ Default.aspx>(Dignity
for All Students Act).  It could be that I’m simply more aware of
trans issues and their marginalization within supposedly LGBT communities
than I was last year — though I was already aware of this issue last year,
and for that reason made a specific point to watch out for its presence.
But whatever the reason, I noticed a significant shift, and I feel obligated
to mention it.

It started, or at least it became noticeable to me, when Governor Paterson
came out to give his speech as the first official speaker.  It was a great
speech, it really was, and I was happy to see him there.  Except.  Well, it
was a great speech if we were only there to talk about marriage equality.
Because that’s all his speech was about.  And that’s not the only reason
we were there.

Of course, it’s entirely possible that the Pride Agenda had no control over
the content of the Governor’s speech.  When it’s the governor speaking, does
an organization have any say in the topic of his remarks?  I really honestly
do not know.  But it seemed to set a tone.

Because marriage equality, though on paper it was not supposed to be, was
the focus of this day.  While GENDA and DASA were often mentioned as
sidelines, for a majority of the morning speakers, they were not the focus,
and they were not even usually given equal treatment.  In fact, I’d say that
GENDA received the least treatment of the three issues in question.  Because
though I don’t remember who it was, I do specifically remember someone
talking at decent length about bullying in schools.  I also admittedly
missed a chunk of the afternoon rally — but from what I saw, it was much of
the same.  It seemed from the program that there was only one speaker at the
rally there to represent trans issues; and I saw her speak, and she only
spoke for a minute or two.

I saw the same dynamic in my lobby visits.  Now, I want to be clear that the
Pride Agenda has no direct control over what goes on in the lobby visits.
The lobby visit facilitators are volunteers who do not officially represent
the organization.  And I will also say that I like the facilitator from my
group very much and spent a good deal of the day in his company.

But when we got to the meeting for our senator — and remember, GENDA has
passed the Assembly, so the Senate is what matters — he had people in our
group talk at length about marriage equality.  Then he had people talk at
length about DASA.  (I personally said something about both bills.)  And
then, before I knew it, the meeting was over.  When I realized what was
happening I tried to catch my facilitator’s eye to say “What about GENDA?”
but he didn’t look my way, and it was too late.  When the one person in our
group who had identified herself as trans questioned him on it after the
meeting, the response was basically a fairly sheepish “yeah, well, I guess I
only got to fit two in.”

When we got back to the banquet hall for the closing, we watched a short
video < com/watch? v=MJF5TREeliw> which debunked many of
the myths that marriage equality opponents use to scare people out of their
support.  There was, it probably goes without saying, no similar video for
GENDA, though the myths and
http://thecurvature .com/2009/ 01/13/because- the-not-in- my-shower- campaign- worked-so- well/>surrounding
such legislation are well-known, rampant and appalling.

There is clearly a problem here.

And that problem could, certainly, have been one that was clearly visible
last year and I simply missed due to ignorance on my part.  I have not
entirely ruled that out — though again, I was actively expecting and looking
for it last year.   So if I had to guess, I would actually, and sadly, place
my money on something that I find even more appalling.

Last year, marriage equality didn’t have a chance in hell.  Sure,
legislators and activists talked the same big game, but everyone knew it.
Republicans controlled the legislative body.  It likely wasn’t going to get
introduced, and if it was, it was going to get shot down.

This year?  Things are significantly different.  53% of New Yorkers recently
polled said that they would support marriage equality in
.<http://www.buffalon on/story/ 646140.html>Democrats
are now in charge, and while that’s definitely not a guarantee,
it’s a lot better.  And the governor has been actively promoting a bill.

In other words: marriage equality has a real, legitimate chance this year.
It might actually make it through.  Before 2009 is over, we might have it.

When marriage equality had no real shot, it seemed to me that GENDA was
portrayed as equally important to it.  It was regularly discussed in
conjunction with the other issues.  And last year, I also had the same lobby
visit facilitator, and we managed to discuss GENDA substantially in all of
those visits.

Now that marriage equality is a very real possibility, GENDA has taken a
back seat — despite the fact that it has significantly greater favor with
http://www.gayallia php?option= com_mojo& Itemid=114& p=2933>,
but much of the same resistance among lawmakers, and establishes rights that
are easily as important, and quite arguably more so.  And so, it seems to me
that the rights of trans people only matter when the real goal, the
currently trendy one, isn’t really on the table.

I am, in all honesty, not particularly surprised by this.  But I am
extraordinarily disappointed and saddened, and also angry.  Because what I
have outlined above, if accurate (and I’m sure the Pride Agenda would
vehemently deny it), is tremendously and unforgivably fucked up.  And even
if I’m wrong about the reasoning — even if things were just as bad last year
— it doesn’t erase the disparity or make it any less of a major issue.

I hope there is no doubt that I would absolutely love to see New York become
the next state to gain marriage equality.  But I don’t want it on the backs
of trans people.  (Of course, there are many trans people who would also
benefit from marriage equality; but I think it would be disingenuous to act
as though it’s the thinking at play here.)

What I don’t want is marriage equality in New York while it’s still fucking
legal to deny a transgender person a place to live.  I don’t want New York
to become the sixth state to instate marriage equality when it is not yet
even the fourteenth state to instate anti- discrimination laws on the
basis of gender identity.

And yet, I’m worried that it’s exactly what’s going to happen.  I worry that
we’re going to end up looking a hell of a lot like New
http://shakespeares sister.blogspot. com/2009/ 04/we-matter. html>.
And that in that event, as so often happens, the rest of the supposed
coalition won’t come back for transgender people.

I’m not saying “the Pride Agenda couldn’t care less about trans people.”
Some certainly would make that argument, but again, as a straight and cis
woman, I don’t think I’m in a position to make that call.

I am, however, in a position to simply report what I saw.  And what I saw
was a day that was supposed to be about rights for all LGBT New Yorkers
largely toss out the T.  I saw a day whose focus was on marriage equality,
not marriage equality, GENDA and DASA.  I saw a disparity, and I saw a
NOTE: This is not a place for 101 questions.  If you have one, google it.

http://thecurvature .com/2009/ 05/07/equality- and-justice- for-whom/

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed

Friday, May 08, 2009


Take responsibility for your own actions. 

Thursday, May 07, 2009

Getting Facts Straight.

As I gather materials for my discussion about transgender issues, I see the importance of having my facts straight. One example is the use of transgendered for transgender. The former is an adjective while the former is a noun. Intersex is used instead of hermaphrodite (I can see why). Crossdresser is substituted for transvestite. It is mostly in the United States,  as transvestite is still used in Europe. 

Part of educating people about transgender issues is helping them to see why some terms are offensive to transgender people. Another is to hopefully demonstrate that transgender people are just like anyone else. We have dreams, desires, and needs. We desire decent jobs, housing, and the ability to pursue happiness.  Some think that we want special treatment but that is not the case. This wouldn't be an issue if all people were treated equally.

The church is where I would love to educate people about what it is to transgender and Christian. Some may think that it's an oxymoron. We were created by God just like he created straight folks. I just happen to be a transgender person. I'm excited about the upcoming discussion. I pray that more opportunities will come.


Sunday, May 03, 2009

Another Kind of Spring

Spring has finally come. The plants awaken from the long winter hibernation. New life bursts forth. Spring reminds me of this time four years ago when  fifty plus years of dormancy was finally breaking through. 

I was confronted with something I didn't understand. Some seeds never make it to the soil surface. This seed in my being wasn't one of them. When it did break soil, a new plant was about to grow. The gender flower was about to blossom. I didn't know what was going on. I received nourishment from some counseling and listening to the stories of those who went through the same experiences.

Today, the bloom is still on my gender flower. Like the hemlock, I have weather some severe storms. Springs have come and gone but the flower is eternal.


Friday, May 01, 2009


Kindness can soften even the hardest of hearts.