Weekend

Enjoy the Labor Day weekend!

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS

I thank you God for this most amazing day, for the leaping greenly spirits of trees, and for the blue dream of sky and for everything which is natural, which is infinite, which is yes.


~E.E.Cummings

Clearer Picture

When I first posted this I wasn't sure at all what the changes would be. Now I have a clearer picture. I sense that in a year or two I'll reveal my identity to my brother and sister. This will be a huge step and I'm not really sure if it will happen.


I also sense there will be another shift in my transgender expression. I have shared with many folks over the past couple of months. This past Sunday another member of the church discovered that I was transgender.

I have degree in childhood education. I have maintained that my teaching career will not necessarily be in a tranditional setting. This seems to be happening more often. I'm preparing some materials about transgender pioneers. Possibly I may educate more folks about our history. That's about where I am at the present time.

More Changes In Store

I have been out in my neighborhood more and more. It's very refreshing to see that people see and treat me like anyone else. I've even received some compliments. It's really wonderful that I can be authentic self.

I see that there will be some changes ahead. I don't know what they will be but I sense it. This is nothing new with me because whatever I did sense in the past came to fruition. I will have a clearer picture in the months ahead.

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS

Never forget the folk who came before you. Never forget thse who helped you.

Compliments

I have been out and about in my neighborhood. I get some compliments about my attire, all positive. I wear sandals during these months and I have received some positive compliments about my feet. A man told me just last night that I have beautiful feet. I always seem to get compliments about me that I don't expect.

Poem

I trek through the same places,
New environs create new spaces.
Have I evolved?
Is the riddle solved?
The storm clouds have lifted,
I see now that I'm gifted.

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS

None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm


~Henry David Thoreau

Tucson's Birthday

I was reading on of my posts about the upcoming birthday party for the city of Tucson, Arizona. The city will be 237 years old. I didn't know that Tucson was around that long.

www.antigonebooks.com

Seen As A Woman

Ever since I came out at my place of worship, I have been treated and spoken to as a woman. It's even happened in other places that I go. Been hit on a number of times also.It's really been amazing. Interacting with the public has helped along with some pointers from my spouse.

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS

As I approve of a youth that has something of the old man in him, so I am no less pleased with an old man that has something of the youth. He that follows this rule may be old in body, but can never be so in mind.

                                                                                                              ~Marcus Tullius Cicero

Chooosing To Be Authentic

You decide that you can no longer continue life on the current course. The gender struggles get stronger and are not going away. The day comes when a decision has to be made. Do you make the changes needed or continue on the track you're running on?

I enjoy reading many posts and the progress people are making. It encourages me that my trans sisters and brothers are choosing to be authentic. This is wonderful and greatly needed. Actions can affect others in ways that we may not always see. It's the reason I choose to be open with others. Just recently, I educated a young couple about my transgenderism. I have seen other transgender people in my neighborhood. I know that they are out there, but not always visible.

There are common threads that run through all the posts. The one that makes the most impression on me is people choosing to be authentic. I was afraid in the beginning. When I made the choice to proceed forward, I never looked back. The footprints of the past were gone. I'm still moving forward. Many of my sisters and brothers are doing likewise.



I never travel this road before.
Lined with thick brush and boulders,
it looks strange and forboding.
there's nothing to guide me.
Each step forward is a step closer to my destiny.
I trek on, not knowing what awaits me.
I'm gently nudged forward by an unseen hand
I look behind me and footprints of my past are gone.   
   

Coming To Terms

     What happens when a person discovers that they aren’t what they thought they were?  What do they do when the time comes to make the decision to accept their real identity?

     Many men and women erroneous thought that they could pray the gay away. Some thought that it was ridiculous that they were more interested in the habits and manners of the opposite gender. Some marry and have children thinking that just need a good mate to take away the urges they have. Men join the army to become ‘real men’. Women become engrossed in womanly pursuits to prove that they are women.

     The day comes when they can no longer keep in who they are. Now they have to decide which it is that they desire to be. As I write this, I’m sure there are men, women, boys, and girls who are tired of hiding. They just want to be authentic. If only society and their family and friends would understand.

     Thankfully many have come out of hiding. It was a grand day when I came out as transgender. Every day many people reveal their true identity to the world. I pray that those folks who are struggling will see that they are created exactly as they are. They have nothing to be ashamed of. They needn’t feel guilty or ashamed. They have the right to be who they are.

DENIAL

                                               

     Reading about folks coming to terms with their gender or sexuality thrills me. It’s a liberating experience for them in that they can move forward to living the lives that they desire. Denial turned out to be an albatross around their necks.

     I’m acquainted with denial because I was in denial several weeks before finally accepting myself as a cross dresser. Denial puts off the inevitable for a short time. We can say that we’re not gay or transgender. We can do all we can to prove to others that we are “manly” or a real woman. For a while things can roll along smoothly. Then the day comes when we’re come face to face with the truth.

     I wonder what many people have committed suicide because they denied an aspect of themselves. It’s one thing that society gives us a hard way to go. When we add denial and self-loathing to an already unbearable load, it’s a matter of before a person shows cracks in the armor.  What’s really sad is when some people who deny who they are will do everything to deny others their rights.

     How each person comes out is a personal matter. It is also vital that each person has a healthy and positive view of themselves. A healthy mind, body, and spirit is as important as looking good or impressing others.  

Still Making an Impact

This past Sunday, another person didn't know who I was until I told them. My wife has been asked a number of times 'where's your other half?' You should see the looks I get when she points out that I'm her. I have also been more comfortable walking around in my own neighborhood.

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS

             WORDS


A kind word can bring joy
A cruel can destroy
A tender word can warm the heart
Bitter words make the spirit tart
Words are like the morning dew
It takes two to say 'thank you'.
Words that tear down
Cause the spirit to drown
In sorrow and defeat
So words must be soft and discreet
Words can cause others to fall
If I don't have a kind word to say
Better to say nothing at all.

Seven Years

On this date in 2005, I came out to myself as a cross dresser. All the tension and struggle and inner turmoil dissipated  upon making that confession. I have progressed from a cross dresser to transgenderist to transgender. I've never been happier.  

Dog Days

The dog days of July and August are upon us. The exciting activity of June with all the pride events has been replaced by the calm placidity of July.  It's easy to assume that nothing is happening but that certainly is not the case.


Here in New York City there's always something going on. The Newfest Film Festival starts tomorrow. I love viewing films made by and for the LGBTQ community. There are many film fests that go on throughout the year.  My spouse and I will celebrate our birth shortly (we were born on the same day). We have written many short stories and poems in the meantime. As you can see life hasn't stopped.


It's a wonderful time to reflect on what has changed in our lives during the year. I'm much different now than I was at this time last year and my wife has noticed it. The dog days are really days we can recharge and relax. I always try to see the value in times like this. Some precious has been the result. I know that up ahead there will be more challenges that will need my attention.   

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS

Find what it is you like to do, then do it with passion and joy.

Reflecting About Bruce Gerig

Last evening I attended a ceremony in which the ashes of my friend were spread into the river. We shared our thoughts about Bruce prior to doing this. Bruce was a generous, loving, and caring man who love God and people. He especially loved the LGBT community. 


Bruce Gerig passed on May 29th at the age of seventy six. He left us a rich legacy of writings, articles, art (which I didn't know that he possessed this talent), and comments. Bruce was a shining example of what we should strive to be in our daily lives. I miss him but the season that he was in my life will always remain.


Rest in peace, Bruce.