Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Point Fermin Lighthouse


This wooden structure is located in Point Fermin Park in San Pedro, California. It was built 1874. The lighthouse overlooks San Pedro Bay.


Resources:

www.sanpedro.com

www.pointferminlighthouse.org/





2014-Summary

In a couple of days, the new year will begin. I have some highlights for 2014, one of them being the increased visibility of transgender people. Transgender people of color were honored more so than usual and that's good. Laverne Cox and Janet Mock set the standard for what we are about and what we still need to accomplish.  

On several occasions I educated people about being transgender and the transgender experience. Many expressed their gratitude for clearing up some of the misconceptions and questions they had. I overcame my fear of going into the ladies restroom. I was just another lady to the other women. I even received compliments on my attire. 

I saw how blessed I am when I was going through a down period in May. A dear woman confined to a wheelchair came outside from a church service. Seeing people in a wheelchair is common but my eyes focused on this woman. I thought that at one time she was young, vibrant and could go anywhere that she wanted. Now she needed help just to stand up. I thought that in spite of her limitations I detested no bitterness or feeling like a victim. That event cleared away the dark clouds hovering over me. 

I'm praying that 2015 will be even better. I'm presently setting my goals for the year (an annual ritual). Here's wishing you a Happy New Year. 

Monday, December 22, 2014

Friday, December 19, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

And know that I am with you always; yes, to the end of time.

~Jesus Christ

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Fond Du Lac Lighthouse



This lighthouse was built by unemployed laborer during the great depression. It stands as a symbol t the community because it was erected during one of the country's darkest times.


Resources:
www.lighthousefriends.com

www.fdl.com





Dialogue And Action

The recent events regarding the police shootings of African American men has sparked protests in many cities. There has been dialogue or the beginning of dialogue between between affected parties. I notice that more young people are becoming more engaged in these topics. It's encouraging but will this lead to any plan(s) of action or, like Occupy, dissipate and fade into oblivion.

I see that these events have sparked dialogue and action in other arenas such as homelessness, the war on drugs, student debt, the prison industrial complex and other areas. I also believe that we as a group and as individuals need to become informed and engaged. Churches need to be engaged in this process because it brings another component to the discussion which has a spiritual element. One of the reasons the civil rights movement stayed strong for so long was the spiritual and non violent approach he used. 


Being a part of the solution is very important to me. Having solutions to the problems can move the dialogue along and hopefully to action. This is what I desire to see. 

Monday, December 15, 2014

All's Well

I got all my Christmas shopping done today. No stress, no fuss. Lately much has been floating around i my head hence I haven't posted anything in over a week. All's well with me. Just couldn't think of anything to write. 

While I was out today, I enjoyed being Genevieve. I was called ma'am by everyone who spoke. I noticed a few men staring at me as I walked past them. I just smiled. I still mind it amazing that people still want to put us down and out just because of who we are. All we want to do is live our lives. I'm not a victim nor will I live life like I am one.

Tuesday, December 09, 2014

Thinking How to Respond

With all the events happening throughout the country, I am now thinking how to respond. I believe there are many areas that need to be discussed.  I can't remember the last incident that I was this conflicted. I could voice my views on a number of things here but I need to focused and provide some kind of truth and encouragement to people.

Friday, December 05, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment.

~Jim Rohm, Businessman (1930-2009)

Monday, December 01, 2014

Ferguson

The decision in the Michael Brown case in Ferguson, Missouri has been made. What lies ahead is anybody's guess. I am praying for the people in Ferguson. I'm praying that people will come together to resolve the problems that plague the black community-children who grow up without fathers, poor education and crime. It's sad that it seems that among the black leaders these are taboo subjects.    

Friday, November 28, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant.

~Robert Louis Stevenson

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Monday, November 24, 2014

Be Thankful



As I have mentioned in past years, this is the time of reflection for me. Much has happened both personally and in the lives of others. 

Over the past year a number of folks in my church have moved on to greater things. I'm thankful that they have pass. Acknowledging them for their contributions and what they meant to you demonstrates a grateful heart. I am mindful that some folks who were here last year aren't with us now. It's easy to take our family and friends for granted until, one day, they aren't here. 

What are you thankful for? I enjoy the feast that I will  have and being with family and friends. I'm thankful for their kindness and hospitality. Thank the people who have meant much to you.

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Thanksgiving Thoughts


Early thoughts on Thanksgiving.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

The tree that is beside the running water is fresher and gives more fruit.

~Saint Teresa of Avila

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Transgender Day Of Remembrance 2014

On Thursday evening I will attend the Transgender Day of Remembrance vigil at the community center here. I'm not sure if it get easier attending but I go nevertheless. I usually encourage the audience, sharing my experiences and at the same time challenging them to be who they are. 

This has been a tough year for transgender people especially in the last five months. With increased visibility has come attacks verbally and physically from politicians, churches, anti-trans groups and others. It won't stop us though. We've always existed and have a right to be treated with dignity and respect. 


This year I'm dedicating my TDOR day to Alex Medeiros who was beaten to death by his father to make a man out of him. Alex liked to wear his hair long, belly dance, and wear women's clothing . Alex was 8 years old.  

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

When I came out as transgender I was liberated and completed; liberated from what society says I'm supposed to be, completed because this part of my journey made me feel whole.

~Genevieve 

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Eshaness Lighthouse

Eshaness (also Esha Ness) is located on the northwest of the Shetland Islands in Scotland.It is located on the Northmavine peninsula which is a remote place. It was built in 1929 by engineers David and Charles Stevenson. It was fully automated in 1974. Eshaness is used for an accommodation for the public during holidays.

I am charmed by the remoteness of Eshaness which can possibly generate some great stories and tales and artistry. American author Sharma Krauskopf spent time there and wrote a book entitled 'The Last Lighthouse'.



www.shetlandlighthouse.com






Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Honoring Our Veterans


Today, I went to Veteran's Day Parade. I have marched in several parades in the past but this day I was a spectator. It was wonderful that the spectators positively to the men and women who served our country. All the service branches were represented. I took special note f the WWII and Korean vets. Some of them may not be here the next parade.

I also thought of the TGLB men and women who served. Some made the  supreme sacrifice while others are struggling with a number of issues. Let's particularly remember the homeless vets (about one million) who are struggling to get the basics for their lives.

If you haven't, congratulate a veteran and thank him or her for their sacrifice. When I marched, I felt the deep appreciation the spectators have for us. Happy Veteran's Day!  



Sunday, November 09, 2014

November

November is traditionally an active month for me and this year's no different. I'm taking care of the household needs while my wife recuperates from knee replacement surgery. She is coming along slowly. On Tuesday I will be at the Veteran's Day parade. I have marched in a few in the past. This time I'm going as a spectator. As a veteran I feel honored to be part of unique group of men and women. 

The Transgender Day of Remembrance vigil will be held at the community center here in New York City. I go every year because its important that I do. It' s not that I have to but I NEED to. I'm thinking of what to say at the event. I'm taking my wife out to Thanksgiving Day dinner at a restaurant. I take this day to be thankful for all things. 

As I get older I appreciate life much more because each day is precious. I have made it a concerted effort to enjoy life. 

Friday, November 07, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

Bad politicians are sent to Washington by good people who don't vote.

~William E. Simon, Public servant (1927-2000)

Thursday, November 06, 2014

Post Election Toughts

The mid term elections are over. The question that comes to mind is-will anything change? I'm of the opinion that we , the people, will have to change AND do the changing. WE need to step up and make the changes that need to be made.

What we are seeing here is a transition. I see a transition of the way we do things. I's sad that many people vote out of fear rather than knowing what the candidates really stand for. I make a habit of doing my home work on each candidate running. Things I look at are their voting record, where they stand on issues, who they get their financing from and so forth. People need to really do their homework on the candidates. I never tell people who they should vote for-that's an individual choice. 

Regarding transgender concerns, I believe that it will be a topic that will have bearing in future electrons. However, WE must work together to foment change. NO one politician can do that-only us. Change will not come from the mainstream organizations because they take money from the government and thus are compromised. It will be the grassroots organizations, people of color, women, young people, the disabled, elderly, and immigrants would will lead the change. 

Some states will be very tough (Texas, for one) but progressing is being made, albeit slowly. We must not give in to disappointment, despair, and bitterness. Another election is coming in two years.

Tuesday, November 04, 2014

My Spiritual Birthday

It was on this day in 1972 that I accepted Jesus Christ an as my Lord and Savior. It was a life changing event for me in that my whole worldview was changed. I had a a love for all human beings and looked at each person the way Jesus would-with love and compassion. . It has been and continues to be an interesting journey. 

My journey as a transgender person mirrors my Christian journey. Actually its the same journey but Christ gives me the strength to continue and inner peace that I feel. God is still the same today as He was when I made the decision to follow him. I wouldn't change a thing about that decision.

Friday, October 31, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

You know, there's a lot of activism that doesn't deal with empowerment, and you have to empower yourself in order to be relevant to any type of struggle.

~ Talib Kweli, Musician (b.1975)

Halloween




I saw this outside one of the stores downtown.

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Winter Is Coming


I was just a few feet away from my furry friend when I snapped this photo. He might be looking for acorns to store away for the winter.

Friday, October 24, 2014

Crossroads


Crossroads come up more often than you think, at least it does with me. So many choices, so many changes. When the choices are all good, then there's a dilemma of choosing which is the best road to take.  

Crossroads, in my mind, means change. Whatever happened in the past is past. the door has closed or is closing. Looking ahead there's uncertainty, trepidation, fear, and no familiarity. You can't stay where you are because change is inevitable. The only recourse is to proceed ahead. 

I'm sure the early pioneers had all the feeling mentioned above and yet they continued moving ahead. They were obstacles and setbacks but they kept going. That's the choice we all will have to make when we're at the crossroads of life.      

Genevieve's Gems

One is always considered mad, when one discovers something that others cannot grasp.


~Ed Wood, Director (1924-1978)

Monday, October 20, 2014

Ile Royale Light



Located on an island off the coast of French Guyana, Ile Royal is among a group of prisons where the worst criminals and political prisoners were sent. The 95 foot structure is almost half brick ad the rest is a skeletal structure. A watchtower, gallery and lantern top the structure.

The lighthouse is still in operation and is a tourism attraction. The water around the island is infested with sharks.


Resources:

http://www.unc.edu/~rowlett/lighthouse/photos/SouthAmerica/IleRoyale/index.htm 
http://www.pbase.com/zulakitten/isle_royale




Transgender Day Of Remembrance

I looked at the memorializing 2014 section of the Transgender Day of Remembrance website. The list seems to be larger and younger. The youngest was eight years old. Brazil sees the most transgender women murdered and this year is no different. 

With the increased visibility has come the increased violence against trans women, the vast majority women of color. We're getting it from all sides from the religious right to trans-exclusion feminists to politicians to law enforcement. We are moving forward, however.  At TDOR vigils I make it a point to pay homage to one person. This year will be no different. I will make this decision at a later date. 

In the meantime, we all need to be vigilent at this important time in history. Remembrance vigils will be held in many places around the world. Please attend one to honor the sisters and brothers we have lost this year.

Friday, October 17, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

Don't let people disrespect you. My mom says don't open the door to the devil. Surround yourself with positive people.

~Cuba Gooding, Jr., Actor (b.1968)  

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

My Thoughts

Over the past several months a number of trans women have been murdered. The majority of them were women of color. The more visibility we have received, the more the haters of trans people have come out.

I can understand those outside the TGLBQI community hating us. It's those inside the community that I find rehensible. We all suffered from harrasment and fear and loss of livelihoods. When the leadership positions were formed (predominantly white and male) trans people, CDs, and drag queens were shunted to the margins. Trans people were not only kept out of their organizations, we were prevented from receiving any kind of help. Personally, I feel that groups like Gay Inc.  are somewhat responsible for some of the troubles trans people experience.  Add the TERF crowd and the religious right, then there's a recipe for trouble.

I'm my travels there are many people inside and outside the community who are lacking in understanding what transgender people face. With the Transgender Day of Remembrance ceremonies coming up in a month or so, there's still so much more educating to be done. I also believe that transphobia (especially inside the community) needs to be called out.

I still believe that if trans rights were put in front in the formative years, many of the issues affecting the comunity would have been resolved. That's just my own thoughts. Let's pray that our increased visibility will open more eyes to the fact that we exist.

Friday, October 10, 2014

Monday, October 06, 2014

Thomas Point Shoal Lighthouse


Originally built in 1825, this is the current structure which was constructed in 1875. It is located near Annapolis at the north end of the South River.,  Maryland. It is the only screw-light in Maryland still on its original spot. 




Reference:
www.thomaspointlighthouse.org

Friday, October 03, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

Wisdom is the right use of knowledge. To know is not to be wise. Many men know a great deal, and are all the greater fools for it. There is no fool so great a fool as a knowing fool. But to know how to use knowledge is to have wisdom.

~Charles Spurgeon, Clergyman (1834-1892)

Wednesday, October 01, 2014

Last Quarter of 2014

Today is the start of the last three months of 2014. Usually my life activities pick up especially in November. Where did the year go?

Have achieved some of the goals you set back in January? It's still not too late. I have discovered that the last quarter of the year is a time for reflection. There have been a few instances where I was a state of limbo. The picture has become much clearer and now it's up to me to follow it up.

Monday, September 29, 2014

Hot And Dry


When I was in the deserts of southeastern California, two aspects of the scenery I remember vividly. It was very hot and dry. There seemed to be no life there. You wondered how anything could survive out there in that climate.

Sometimes are lives are like the desert. You feel stuck in the middle of nowhere, not knowing which direction to go. I have felt that way on a number of occasions. Perhaps, God is allowing me to have a break from all the activity and access what's really important. I do know that things will be different from what they were. 

It can be scary with the uncertainty surrounding us.  I am reminded that I am not alone. God is there even when there seems to be nothing around me that makes sense or we can put an anchor on something that tangible. I am reminded that know I don't understand everything He is right there paving the way. I just need to trust and follow. 

Friday, September 26, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

The true secret of happiness lies in taking a genuine interest in all the details of daily life.

~William Morris, Designer (1834-1896)

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

New London Ledge Lighthouse




New London Ledge Lighthouse is located Thames River, located at the mouth of New London Harbor. I was struck that such a ornate structure was built in the middle of a busy waterway.

New London Ledge is on the list of haunted lighthouses. The ghost of a man named 'Ernie' who had committed suicide by slashing his throat. His body was taken by the sea but his spirit remains taking care of the lighthouse.






Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Poem

Amtrak
By Richard J. Fein

"We're not getting anywhere.
All you do is keep on asking
why, why. I've told you again
and again, I wasn't thinking.
What more do you want me to say?
You've got to put it behind you. Look
...huh?...hmmm...uh-huh...OKbye."
Sidling out, turning, as if needing
the rest room, I pause
ever so slightly, feign
at righting my balance before
going down the aisle,
shoot my furtive look at the body of the voice
on the cell phone-maybe twenty,
pale, white sweater, white skirt, running shoes,
and staring into the back of my seat
as if her eyes were burning a hole
right through the upholstery
to my antimacassar,
but what I can't keep
from fixing on
is the slab
of elliptic buttons on her lap.

Friday, September 19, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

It is only the farmer who faithfully plant seeds in the spring, who reaps a harvest in the autumn.


~B.C. Forbes, Journalist (1880-1954)

Autumn

Autumn will be here next week (where did the summer go?). It's my favorite season because I love the beauty of the landscape when the leaves change colors. It signals that the summer's planting and watering will yield a bountiful harvest. Apples are ripe for picking and so are grapes.

Autumn is a reminder that I am to be thankful for what good thing has come my way. I learn from the bad events and do whatever I can to correct them. As fall's slumber gradually comes let 's give thanks for all that  has happened.


Wednesday, September 17, 2014

We Are Called

This past Sunday's sermon really spoke to me. The minister shared that we are called by God. Our youth, preparation, and sense of inadequacies does not eliminate us from His calling.

The second point stressed was that it isn't about us. The point of Christians being called is to bring God's love and kingdom to the spiritually lost and dying. Moses didn't feel that he was good enough to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. Jonah did everything he could to get out of going to Nineveh. Jeremiah thought that he was too young to prophesy to the people of his day. The sermon by the way was taken from Jeremiah chapter1, verses 4 through 10.  

God knew who we were to be before we were born. He knew that I was transgender before I was ever conceived. The takeaway message I received is I am to follow God's call whether or not I'm ready or feel ill- equipped. It's a message to all of us who call ourselves God's children.

Monday, September 08, 2014

Reconnecting

This past weekend I reconnected with an old friend who now lives in California. She is visiting the city for a few days before returning home. It was great hearing from her. 

This event reminds me of the times I reconnected with my true feelings. Sometime in the busyness of daily life we lose touch with ourselves. There comes a day when you feel tired, stagnant, empty. I ran out of gas. I reached a crossroads. It's not a good feeling because you feeling like you're in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean with no oars.   

Appreciating the moments that we're in  makes life worthwhile and with meaning. We can't control some things that happen in daily living but it shouldn't overwhelm us. Take the time to smell the roses. Daily duties will always be with us; friendships and precious moments won't always be there.

Friday, September 05, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.


~Joseph Campbell, Writer (1904-1987)

Thursday, September 04, 2014

Life Full

I haven't posted here in several days due to some family matters. It has been quite a week to say the least. I have been reading, writing, going out and enjoying life.

The 2014 NFL season starts today (Green Bay vs. Seattle) and goes full bore on Sunday. I will post my predictions tomorrow. College football has gotten underway in what I believe will be a topsy-turvy year.

Summer is almost over but the fall is approaching. It's my favorite time of year, especially when the leaves change colors. I hope to take my granddaughter apple picking upstate in a few weeks. No climbing trees for me, though. I' m a little too old for that.

Sunday, August 31, 2014

Living Our Lives

Every two weeks a group of us trans women get together for a meeting to discuss various topics. Afterwards some of us gather at a nearby restaurant for coffee and food. I love these women who are my sisters. Months ago I said that I wanted to meet other trans women for friendship. That has certainly come to pass.

After each meeting I gain a better understanding about each person. We all just want to live our lives as we really are. It doesn't take rocket science to see this. Yet, there are those who believe that we are a menace to civil society. The question I would ask is a menace to whom?  Is it because we challenge their own belief system as to what a 'real' man or 'real' women should be? Is it because their belief system is shattered because it isn't finite or conclusive to their own views of life?    This why you have wars, poverty, and discrimination. Some of these sociopathic 'do-gooders' have reaped more harm to many people than all the wars and battles. 

When I read the list of transgender people murdered  on the Transgender Day Of Remembrance website , it illustrates some of my points. It breaks my heart when many women (especially women of color) are killed simply for who they are. It also shows me that we have survived and are thriving through all the morass and hatred thrown at us. I'm a proud transgender woman whose living my life as the person I really am. So are millions other transgender people.

Monday, August 25, 2014

I was going through my files looking at some old articles, some  as old as a decade. I read over a project I did regarding cross dressing and the bible. It was an intensive project with much research, reading, and solicitation from people more wise than I about such matters. It was a fun project which helped me understand how being a Christian and gender variance is possible.

It also reminded me the importance of doing my homework

Summer Lessons

September 1st will mark the unofficial end to the summer. Seems like it only started. Some may think that one's learning stops at the end of the school year when in reality we learn something every day.

There's the formal education of school, then there's the informal education life teaches us. Did we learn something about ourselves? Was there any improvement of a particular talent or gift? Did you have an epiphany about something that may have been spoken or performed a while back? Either way we are not the people we were several weeks back.

As a the new school year begins, see if you can apply some lessons you learned during the warm summer months. It may prove invaluable in the future. Nothing that you learn ever goes for naught.



Friday, August 22, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant.


~Robert Louis Stevenson

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Perception and Reality

One of the aspects of being out is how people perceive you. It's something that I don't think about consciously all the time but it's there nevertheless. I have been perceived as female much of the time now, especially when I'm out with my wife. She feels much more comfortable with my gender identity now. 

I mentioned to a group of ladies that we can and will enjoy our lives when we live without fear. This is something I wanted long before now and now I'm living it. Along the way if I have changed people's minds about transgender people, then I consider this to be a blessing for that individual and us as transgender people. One more mind has been changed.  

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Wonderful Month

August has been a wonderful month. My wife and I celebrated our birthdays on the 4th. We attended a service where the music was performed in a jazz style. We absolutely loved it! We'll be going again this Friday. We went to a movie this past Friday. As you can see, we've been out quite a bit.

When my wife was away a few weeks ago, I was able to depressed a bit. I went out but sat down by the river or in a park. I see how blessed I am and really enjoy life. I'm focused and am doing things that I put off for a while. Really don't have time to waste. 

Friday, August 08, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

Wisdom, compassion and courage are the three universally recognized moral qualities of men.


~Confucius

Wednesday, August 06, 2014

2014 NFL Football Season



Preparations for the 2014 NFL football are under way. I've bee a rabid Jets fan since 1960 when they were known as the New York Titans. I was 20 years old when I watched the Jets win Super Bowl III. It's been a loooong dry spell.  Is this the year a miracle could happen? The offense needs to improve and with the new additions I believe it has. The key will be the play of the Jets quarterback, whether it's Geno Smith or Michael Vick. The defense looks solid in the front seven. The secondary needs to be sorted out.   

I not making any predictions now because camps only started a couple of weeks ago. I will have when training camp is over and all the other technicalities are sorted through (injuries, waiver wire pickups, etc). Hope this season will better than last year's 8-8 record.


Productive Day

Today was very productive for me. I went to the local library and wrote an essay. Maybe this doesn't seem significant but it was the first time in several weeks that felt I was in the right frame of mind. I found a quiet place where I can concentrate. I concentrate best when it's totally quiet.

I'm working on one reading project of one of my favorite authors. I'm also seeking to be involved with an organization which is bringing transgender concerns to the fore. I was out all day today and I'm not tired. It's because I slowed down and enjoyed the precious moments of solitude. I didn't feel harried or the need to d something. I do have a bad habit of doing too many things. I'm learning how to concentrate on a few things and to do them well.  

Tuesday, August 05, 2014

Birthday

Yesterday, I celebrated my 66th birthday. My wife's birthday the same day. We celebrated at a local restaurant. I think about it and say 'Wow!'. 

Later at night I was reminiscing the things that have happened in my life. Some were good, others not so good. Some were quite unexpected. It's been a wonderful life nevertheless.

Friday, August 01, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

No man is free who is not master of himself.

~Chinese proverb

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Renovation, Renewal and Reconciliation

My church is going through renovations. An atrium is being constructed to improve access from the street. The new nursery recently opened The fellowship hall is being remodeled and new classrooms are being put in. The project will be completed some time next year.

Our personal lives go through renovations from time to time. Some old  habits will need to be dealt with. Some wrongs need to be righted. Forgiveness and being forgiven will need to take place. Whenever there is a new project or revelation the old way of thinking and doing things will need to change. In regards to transgender rights, this renovation is needed in our social institutions, schools, and families. Change is never easy but there's the time when they have to be made. 

A transgender husband, wife, or child will change the dynamics of families. There may be some anger, hurt, accusations of deception and rejection. What's needed is understanding, reconciliation and, in the case of bitter words spoken, forgiveness. We never asked to be born the way we are because it wasn't something that we had control. We just ask to be accepted as people. 

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Kilauea Lighthouse




This lighthouse is locate on Kilauea Point on Kaua'i , Hawaii. The structure stands 52 feet high and was first opened 1913. The lighthouse during the duration of World War II after the attack on Pearl Harbor.

Saturday, July 26, 2014

Nine Years Of Transgender Bliss

Today is the ninth anniversary of my coming out. It was such a relief when I first came out. All the internal stress and tension dissipated with that one act. Ever since that day my has been wonderful.

Over these years I grew from a struggling cross dresser to a contented transgender woman. It's wonderful when I read that many men and women come out on their own. I have tried to be helpful to others in any way possible. I have been helped immeasurably by man people on the forums and in person. 

Looking back, it has been an interesting journey to say the least. It get more interesting every day. I certainly would not change anything.

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Night Skyline Symbolized Ending of a Life Chapter.


I like skylines of cities especially the ones at night. Above is the skyline of Riverside, California (chose this one because it's part of the novella I am writing). I enjoy the quietness that settles over the city. I live in a different city but the skyline is magnificent. 

Late at night I peer through the blinds gazing at the lights on the dark background. I have come to view skylines at night as a changing of life's fortunes. A chapter in life is drawing to a close. Another one will dawn. It symbolizes my own life because there have been so many chapters in my life that have drawn to a close. Those chapters can last day, week, a year or years. When I sense a change coming, I use the night skyline as an analogy.     

Over the past several weeks, I have felt this. I expect these things and at times welcome them. My life journey has periods of great light and vitality. It also has periods of reflection and fogginess. It doesn't mean that there's an end; just a new beginning.

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

LIfe's Continuous Journey

Today I met my spouse at the Amtrak railway station here in New York. I love watching the people go about rushing to an fro for their trains. Trains were heading everywhere. New Haven. Roanoke. Newport News. Washington, D.C. Boston. I remember traveling to Albany back in April. It reminded me of my childhood when I journeyed to summer camp.

Life is a journey. There's so many directions that we can go. I see traveling on my itinerary for the future. My spouse and I will gong to Philadelphia in August. Next year, I would love to venture to the west coast. Looking at it, one could say that life is a journey that last until the end. We cannot stop or control its continuous forward progression. Enjoying the special and pleasant moments that come make living worthwhile. 

Monday, July 21, 2014

Take Care Of Today


Yesterday I sat in the courtyard in front of St. Mark's church (pictured above) enjoying a very pleasant day. Service was going on. Afterwards, I observed the people coming out. I took note of a woman in a wheelchair being wheeled to a waiting cab. 

I've seen plenty of folks in wheelchairs but this woman caught my eye. She was once young vibrant, and could go anywhere she pleased. Now she needs help.It reminds me that I need to do the tasks and projects that I have now because there will come a day when I will not be able to.

Friday, July 18, 2014

Creativity

Creative people have done extraordinary things to enrich the lives of  others and the world. It doesn't follow any particular pattern. I look at people like Michaelangelo, Gandhi, Martin L. King, and DaVinci. Some of the most creative people the world has known weren't greeted with open arms.

My favorite writers were ridiculed and criticized because they were unconventional. I list Edgar Allan Poe, Jack Kerouac, and Jim Morrison in that group. Herman Melville was ostracized because he didn't follow the prevailing convention of that time. Paul Laurence Dunbar was blasted by some African American critics for writing in slave dialect. He didn't speak it himself but heard it from the actual people themselves.

Creativity is something that cannot be stifled. I can't remember the last time I saw a movie that was unique and different. American movies are mostly recycled from the past (Batman, Superman). It hurts me when children's creativity is stifled for conformity. 

Creativity is something we all possess in varying degrees. It doesn't what age, race, or gender. There may someone waiting to influenced by the spark of uniqueness that you have.

Genevieve's Gems

Creativity is a great motivator because it makes people interested in what they are doing. Creativity gives hope that there can be a worthwhile idea. Creativity gives the possibility of some sort of achievement to everyone. Creativity makes life more fun and more interesting.
~Edward de Bono

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Frying Pan Light Tower



This unusual structure is located 29 miles southeast of Southport, North Carolina. It was built in 1966. The 80 foot structure is at the meeting point of the Cape Fear River and Atlantic Ocean.  It has two floors. THe subfloor is used at a bed and breakfast. I admit that this is different but I'm not so sure that I would spend a night at such a place. It's a great pace for the adventurous.

Frying Pan Tower is accessible by helicopter on the heliport built on the platform. It was automated in 1976 and decommissioned in 2003.


Sources:
www.fptower.com

Monday, July 14, 2014

Smelling The Roses

Now that summer has settled in it's time for me to do things that I enjoy. I share this with people the need to enjoy their lives. Sometimes we wrapped up in our daily lives that we don't take the time to smell the roses. 

Last week, I walked along the pier in the early evening. It was a mild evening where many folks were hanging out. I've gone there many times because it's relaxing. It's one of the simple pleasures that I truly enjoy. At times I won't use the computer or write for a few days because I need to recharge. When I return I feel recharged. I sometimes come away with new and interesting perspectives about life.     

I pray that you all enjoy your summer. Enjoy those precious moments that come because in a moment, it will be gone.Put down the i-pads, laptops and phones and take time to enjoy nature. Don't sweat the small stuff either.

Friday, July 11, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

Getting away from things familiar can help us appreciate what we really have.

Sunday, July 06, 2014

Reconnected With Old Friends

Last night, I attended a prayer meeting at a friend's home. It was the first time in two years that I've seen most everybody. We used to meet bimonthly at the community center. There was conversation, food, and reconnecting. Later we spoke our prayer requests before going into prayer.

Some of the people have changed. A few lost weight (me included). Others are seeking jobs and stable relationships. We all thank God where He has brought us and trust Him for our needs. I was very happy see everyone. As TGLB people we have so much in common.

Tuesday, July 01, 2014

World Cup-USA Ousted



I am a big fan of the world cup soccer. I watch it every four years. I played soccer when I was in the service. I watch the US-Belgium game today at a local lounge. The place was packed! It was a good game and US laid it all out and lost 2-1 to a skilled Belgium team. The US has improved much over the past 25-30 years. I'm happy that the team got this far but disappointed in the loss. Belgium is a better team. My congrats to them.

Monday, June 30, 2014

New York City Pride Parade

Yesterday, my wife and I attended the New York City Pride Parade. We and other members of the collegiate churches helped serve water to the marchers. I love being out there and providing refreshment to the weary participants. Interacting with them is a treat. 

Many thank us for the water and the words of encouragement. One marcher remarked that he had just about given up on the church but when he saw us out there providing refreshment it sparked a sense that maybe he could see the church as a part of social action. Many churches participated in the parade, more so than last year I believe. There were a number of Catholic churches there. we thanked them for what they are doing for TGLBQI folks. An estimated one million people watched the parade. I think that there were more. 

Later, I thought that 40 years ago none of the many organizations who participated weren't in existence. The march has come a long way. I would to see more political and radical aspects come back instead of the corporate feel the parade has at times. It was a fine parade nevertheless.

Friday, June 27, 2014

HAPPY PRIDE!

HAPPY PRIDE!




Genevieve's Gems

My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.

~Maya Angelou, (1928-2014)

Better

I am feeling better than I have in a while. I'm not ill physically; just sorting things out in my life. I meet twice a month with other trans women and it has been a blessing. They are all around my age and just listening to their stories is encouraging. 

I'm seriously looking into some activism. I want to be a part of trans people moving forward. Here in New York State, GENDA is a big topic and order of business. It's amazing that many states have protections for transgender people but New York State doesn't. 

I will be serving water to the marchers at the pride parade on Sunday. My spouse and I have done the this the past three years. We really enjoy doing this.



Friday, June 20, 2014

Hansan Hang Light


I like places and structures that are different. This South Korean lighthouse is one of most creative and unusual structures I have seen.

Genevieve's Gems

There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. 'Good pride' represents our dignity and self-respect. 'Bad pride' is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance.



Brooklyn Pride

Last Saturday, my family and I attended Brooklyn Pride. I have attended the event almost every year. It has grown from humble beginnings to a major event in the borough. It moved from Prospect Park West to the chic Fifth Avenue which has grown from a sleepy lower middle neighborhood to an upscale area with boutiques and restaurants. 

I see more different organizations there, especially religious organizations. To me that's a good sign and some churches and synagogues are accepting of TGLB people. Brooklyn has a growing TGLB community who just opened up a new community center a couple of years.

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Struggling Through The Darkness

In the early days when I was all jumbled up internally, I harbored thoughts that I had never thought I had inside of me. I wanted to leave everthing behind. I wished that no one had ever known me. Disappearing into the sea of life seemed like a plausible solution to the darkness I felt in my heart.

I' m nowhere near those days now but the thoughts of those things have crept into me in recent days. I guess that this is part of the process of transition. It's tough because I know the answer is down the road. It's the figuring out and waiting that's hard. I do believe that putting myself on the line will be one element of the next chapter in my life. That I do believe. In the meantime I will seek, search, and pray for direction.
.

Sunday, June 15, 2014

A Bit Of A Down TIme

For the past few weeks I have been experiencing a down period. I'm not depressed; it' just another crossroads that I've come to. This is by far the longest down period I've had. I have some ideas as to what I would like to do (activism, educating others about being transgender, writing) but I'm not going to rush into anything. 

I have to admit this has been building up in me for awhile. I'm just trusting the Lord for guidance and direction. 

Sunday, June 08, 2014

Pride Month

We kicked off pride month by having our annual prom last Friday. My spouse ad I danced our tails off. This month has become a traditionally busy one for the church. Today we celebrated Pentecost. Today's service was different with communion, the dance ministry performing and the children's choir singing.

Over the past year many churches have had to deal with the TGLB issues. Some have discovered that there are members within their on congregation who are trans, gay, lesbian, bi, and other gender non conforming identities. Perhaps they knew it all along but kept to the margins. This has been a long time coming. Forty years ago such topics were taboo. Now it come more into the open. I say that it's about time. 

I will beat attending the pride parade serving water to the marchers. Some think that pride marches have lost its relevance because of the corporate sponsors. That much is true. I would love to see the parade show more from the political and activist angle because that side of the picture is coming more to the fore. 

The landscape is changing and I'm happy to be a part of it. Changes are happening in places that were thought difficult. Places like Arkansas, Mississippi and Alabama are tackling TGLB issues. I say right on! We are o the march.  

Tuesday, June 03, 2014

Transgender 101

This past Sunday, the adult education class at church featured transgender basics to members of the church. A number of people (about 20) came. Tracy, a transsexual woman , and I shared our experiences which quite different. What was really clarified was the difference between sexual orientation and gender identity. 

A number of questions were asked of both Tracy and me. Later a few people thanked me for clarifying their questions. We will have another such class in November a we get near Transgender Day of Remembrance.

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Transgender Ministry

This past Sunday after service, the associate pastor mentioned to me that he's considering starting a ministry for transgender people in the fall. I like the idea because it will be a place where transgender can do things together. There are transgender people in the neighborhood and from what I understand a few in our church. However, trans people are invisible. I am excited about this prospect. I' m sure there will be more discussions in the future.

Thursday, May 22, 2014

My Journey-A Continuing Saga

When I was an athlete, I enjoyed the practices ore than the actual event. To me the preparation was a part of where I wanted to reach. The picture above reminds of the continual journey I'm on now. It seems lonely at times but it's a journey no one else can take for me. 

Yesterday, I was sitting in a quiet spot meditating. The thought came that there's more roads to trod. I may not understand where and why I'm being led this way however I can't go back to where I was. I have looked back at my life many, many times and saw that the footprints that I left behind me were gone. So much has changed in the last decade and so have I.

 

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Retired-And Busy As Ever

I am unofficially retired. If a part time job that I like comes up I will investigate it. I don't want to go through the 9-to-5 grind anymore. I am busier now than ever before. I'm able to do things that I have a passion for.

Writing is one of my passions. Still working on a chapbook I want to publish. Recently I dived into activism having attended Equality and Justice Day in Albany a few weeks ago. There are a few hot button issues that I'm interested in. There's not a lack of activities to do. I said years ago that when I retire I'm going to be doing something. Now I have the opportunity.

People should enjoy retirement years because they have earned it. Find things you are passionate about and pursue them. Two of my goals are to get my master's degree and learn to play bass guitar. I know one dear lady in her eighties who does such wonderful needlework and quilt making. Remember some of the best times are ahead of you.

Saturday, May 17, 2014

Genevieve's Gems

There are dreamers and there are achievers. The difference between the two is action.


~Chinese Proverb 

Thursday, May 15, 2014

From Then To Now

It was about this time nine years ago that my gender struggles came to the fore. I had never had such issues in the past. That's what really confused me. It wasn't an easy time for me because I didn't know what I was grappling with. 

In the following weeks things became clearer to me. I discovered that I was a cross dresser. moving ahead I saw that feelings ran much deeper than clothing. In time I realized that I was transgender. There were discoveries, struggles, research, meeting people, support groups, and trials by fire. Embracing each experience help moved me forward to where I needed to get to. 

Now, nine years later, I am a happy and content transgender woman. I'm being the person that I really am. Every day I discover something new. I learned long ago how fluid gender is. Trying to say I have it under control is like trying to grasp water. I just enjoy the ride.