I hope your Thanksgiving was good. This was my first as a crossdresser. I enjoyed the weekend though I couldn't dress. There will be other times. I took a walk today, reminiscing the journey that I am on. The further I go, the more my psyche is transformed. I have read much about the history of transgenders and transvestites in social struggles all over the globe. I am a recipient of that struggle, a fact I don't ignore or take lightly. Here I am; a TV/CD whose feminine side is being more clearly defined. I'm not much on labels because how I feel about myself is more important. My trans sisters well being is more important than what others choose to label me. Looking ahead, I see some milestones waiting for me. I'm not afraid nor do I seek attention. I'm just taking another step in my side as 'Genevieve'.

I am feeling good today. I am very happy with the way my life is going. I am looking forward to Thanksgiving Day. It is a chance to relax and reflect.
I finished reading Leslie Feinberg's book, "Transgender Warriors". I was surprised to find out how much crossdressers and trans people have impacted many social movements in America. I learned that transgenderism is common and worshipped in many cultures. Native Americans have a long history of crossdressing and transgenderism. I am fascinated by this, since I have Native American blood in me. Transgenderism is a part of my ancestry. I rate this book a nine (on a scale of one to ten). I highly recommend "Transgender Warriors" to understand what it means to be transgendered.

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS Never let others define who you are.

Up to this point, I believe my greatest accomplishment is keeping crossdressing into perspective. I know that I can never be a woman but it is nice to fantasize. It is nice to look at ourselves in a postive and healty light. It is important to accept the things we cannot change and improve our lives in the areas that we can. I have mentioned a completeness that I feel. Crossdressing is the spectrum in transgenderism that I am most comfortable. One of my goals for 2006 is to get a better understanding of the other people in the transgender community. I want to know more about the transsexual, the intersexed, the androgynous, and the other members of my family. I also will encourage those who need it.

I had a wonderful meeting with my support group. We discussed what the holidays mean to us as transgendered people. It will be tough for some for one reason or another. I just pray that my trans sisters will reflect on the good things that has happened in their lives. We can be thankful for each day God gives us. This will be my first Thanksgiving as a transgender individual. I will be interesting to see what emotions that I will experience. I have not come out yet but it will be a good barometer as to where I am as a crossdresser. I can honestly say that I have not had a down day since I became a crossdresser. Even during the dry periods, I never felt ashamed or guilty about what I was doing. I learn something every day that I did not know before. I have met some wonderful people in the transgender community. I still have a looong way to go, but each morsel I taste from every resource is invaluable.

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS Once you discover who you are, help someone else in their self discovery.

I am reading a great book by Leslie Feinberg called 'Transgender Warriors'. It is the first book I have read which goes back through history when transgender and crossdressing were normal in many cultures. Trans people and crossdressers led many rebellions by peasants against their oppressors in the Middle Ages up to the Industrial Revolution. Crossdressing is a normal part of the Native American cutures. I am part Native American, therefore I am research this aspect of my ancestors. This holiday season will my first as a transgendered man. I am curious to found how and what my feelings will be. I have much to be thankful for. I have changed much this year and there are more changes in store for me.

I was ill for a few days last week but I feel better. I missed my gender drop-in meeting last Wednesday because of my illness. I am organizing a short story about a man who is at a crossroad in his life after being outted as a crossdresser. I look forward to writing it and, possibly, posting it on this blog. I wonder how many men have had to start over because they were outted? I have been working hard developing my feminine side. I have a clear idea of what kind of 'Iady' Genevieve can be. Once I finalize the clothes I want to purchase, things will fall into place.

The past few days have been the quietest of my crossdressing life. I appreciate these times because I can see how far I have come as a crossdresser. I researched the definition of 'transgender'. Each article and book I have read has one interpretation or another. I have found two constants: the various genders within transgender and it digresses from the norm. I respect and embrace the variety. I have read how transgender has been part of Native American tribes for centuries. I also researched the difference between crossdresser and transvestite. The former has to do with wearing women's clothes, while the latter derives erotic arousal. To me, there is no difference. When I crossdress, there are times I get aroused and times when I am not. I am still a crossdresser/transvestite. It does not matter if I am referred by one label or the other. I am reading Leslie Feinberg's book 'Transger Warriors'. It is an interesting book, so much so, that I have more questions. Though crossdressing is enjoyable, I have come to the conclusion that crossdressing goes deeper than putting on women's clothing. There I go; my analytical mind in overdrive again.

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS Self acceptance is the first step toward inner healing.

Today has been a busy one. I have been on the internet searching for more articles about transgender issues, especially crossdresser and transvestite material. I just finished a book titled 'Finding the Real Me.' The people who shared their experiences are to be commended. There are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, transsexual, pre and post op, androgynous and others. Some of the people are still dealing with their identity and gender issues but are moving forward. I thought about my situation as a heterosexual crossdresser and it's no different. There 's so much bigotry and ignorance about us. I love being a male who likes to wear women's clothing. Some day I would love to share my story so others will be encouraged.

GOOD MORNING!