Wife's Poem Spot On About My Gender Transformation

A few days ago my wife read a poem to me that she wrote. It was about my transformation from my being male to now being a transgender woman. She was definitely spot on in her assessment. When I asked her more about her feelings, she said that she can't do anything about it and that's a part of who I am.

I have to reassure her that I'm still the same person, but I just have a different mindset. I explained that it's always been in me and not something that I chose. I sense that she fears losing the male part of me but actually she isn't. I answer all her questions when she asks them. I also share more of my feelings when the need to do so arises. I never ever want to to put her in a position where she has to explain about my transgender identity. I'm open with her about this.

~Genevieve

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS

I look forward to the day when we all can be respected for who we are.


~Genevieve

A Wonderful Time

With the wave of transgender bills being debated , our presence is being made. Some of it has been very positive with transgender candidates being elected, transgender protections being enacted, and others seeing the plight that we face. There is the negative aspect also.
A transgender woman was attacked in Maryland and another transsexual woman was murdered in Baltimore several weeks ago.

I'm so glad to be living in a time when all of this happening before my eyes. In 1971, there were hardly any services for transgender people. During the eighties, we suffered from ignorance by the greater society and by some who felt that we should 'wait our turn' (we've been involved all along).

I am happy with the progress that we are making but am reminded that there's still a long way to go.

Enjoying Warm Weather

Yesterday I was out in the city just enjoying the warm weather (finally). I am totally comfortable with my surroundings and do the things that I enjoy. While I don't call attention to myself, I do see the importance of being out in public. Someone else may need to encouraged; to know that it's alright to be and express themselves. I don't know if there was such a person out in my travels yesterday but you never know.

~Genevieve

Not Much Writing

I have been busy looking for a new place. We're suppose to sign the lease tomorrow. It didn't take long to find a place either which is a first for me. I haven't written much but I should be back at it by next week.

~Genevieve

GENEVIEVE'S GEMS

In wisdom gathered over time I have found that every experience is a form of exploration. ~Ansel Adams (1902-1984)

Exploring The City

Yesterday, I was walking around the city enjoying the mild weather. I traveled up to some of the haunts that I frequented during my youth. The once baudy red light district was now upscale, modern, and just as crowded as it was when I hung out there those many years ago. As the memories flloded in me, the need to explore gender further filled my heart. I have always been open to whatever experiences come my way. Where this is leading I don't know. I have written a number of poems about my experiences. I think about gender quite a bit and some day want to speak and write about it in an intelligent and postive matter. ~Genevieve

Transgender Bills Being Argued and Debated

There has been much action in many states regarding issues concerning transgender people. Bills are being debated on in Nevada, Texas, Maine, Hawaii, Connecticut. A transgender bill in Maryland (HB 235) failed (rightly so) over concerns of no provisions for public accomodations. While I see much activity I can't help but think that now allies and those who say they support us have to put their money where their mouth is. Rep. Barney Frank gagged on it over three years by throwing transgender folks under the bus. Same thing happened in Maryland a few days. I see that some progressive transgender organizations are taking up their own banner and I'm encouraged by that. This reminds me of the dot-com craze a decade ago. Every day dozen of new companies were made public on the stock exchange. After following this awhile, I decided to wait until the dust settled. By the next year, hundreds of those companies no longer existed or were taken over by another company. I believe the dust is settling as to how serious some organizations are about transgender folks getting thier rights. Only time will tell. ~Gennee

Mid-Week Inspiration

From the equality of rights springs identity of our highest interests; you cannot subvert your neighbor's rights without striking a dangerous blow at your own. ~Carl Schurz (1829-1906)

Incrementalism is Unacceptable

Mercifully, a flawed bill in Maryland has died in the Maryland senate. HB 235, which has no provision for public accomodations, is a flawed bill which would have hurt transgender people in that state. Transgender people could have been denied access to bathrooms, restaurants, social services, the movies, dressing rooms, and other public places. This flaw was pointed by many transgender activists and concerned citizens, only to be ignored by those who are suppose to represent us. There is this idea by Gay Inc. and others that incrementalism is better than nothing at all. I beg to differ on such logic. If there was incrementalism regarding freedom for slaves, we would still have slavery. Gay Inc. is one of those organizations who, in my mind, confirm that assimilation was more important than equality back in burgeoning gay movement in the late sixties. Transgender people were at the forefront of the movement. When the mostly white, white middle class gay males assumed the leadrship positions, transgender people were shunted to the margins because we were'presetable to the straight world. Like Prop 8 in California, minority communities were ignored. The vast majority of LGBT people discrimnated against and murdered are people of color. My question is that if you're getting your behind kicked by the cops and social institutions that hate you, do you really care about looking good. Come on, get real. As a transperson and an African-American I proudly wear my identity. If people want to know me, that's fine. If they don't, that's fine too. I have have to justify who I am and why I exist. While the bill failed this time, it can be presented with the public accomodations included. HB 6599 in Connecticut has done it right with access to public accomodations included. What disturbed me is that Equality Maryland didn't have the courage to admit they had a flawed bill and lost the gamble. A final point is that if groups like Gay Inc. received incremental equality they would be screaming bloody murder. Why in the world should transgender people accept this? I will NOT accept incrementalism under any circumstances. The sooner that Gay Inc., Equality Maryland and all the spin doctors who shut us out understand that the better it will be for all. ~Genevieve

I believe that no man who holds a leader's position should ever accept favors from either side. He is then committed to show favors. A leader must stand alone. ~Mother Jones

Gennee's Thoughts

One area that I think about is men and women who come out later in their lives. Many have done so and are much happier with their lives. Then there are those who really want to but, for various reasons, do not. It's not my place to say that one must come out. This is a personal matter and I respect everyone's space. I just come to offer my support in your struggle. It doesn't mean that you cannot live a meaningful life. I am not going to have SRS surgery or take hormones because I'm happy as I am. It's sad that in some quarters, some feel that you're not a "true" transsexual unless one has the surgery. Surgery is not right for everyone. The fact is that many transsexual folks do not have the surgery. What's important is that you are comfortable in your own skin. When I came out to my spouse it was a life changing event for both of us. Thankfully, she is accepting of my being transgender. I know there's nothing wrong with me but of the society that refuses to acknowledge me and others like me of our humanity. There's always loss in our lives whether or not our gender or sexuality is different. I've had some wonderful friendships in my life. Whne those friendships ended, I established new ones. It's important to enjoy the moments we are in. We have no control over the future or how it will turn out. Each day I discover something new in life. I'm very thankful for those who walked before me. I'm thankful for many people who celebrate the victories in their lives. I empathize with those who are suffering and struggling. Whatever you know that must do, do it. ~Genevieve