Journey into the woods

When I was a boy I loved to venture out into the woods near my home. My mom would tell me not to go in the woods but I usually did. Like any boy, I was curious as to what was in the thick shrubbbery and tree lined paths? Were there rabbits, frogs, or chipmunks? Were there more trees and bushes? What was more curious to me is where would the path I was on take me?

In my journey as a transgender person, that same curiosity compels me to continue forward. I ask myself if this journey will ever end? A more important question is will what I discover stop me from moving forward or cause to turn back? There are some decisions one makes that the consequences cannot be undone. I'm sure there are many folks who decided to transition has asked themselves this question. The day I decided that I was going to live life openly, I knew that there would be ridicule, comments, and comtempt on some people's part.

When you choose to live differently, it does open a can of worms. It's my life and no one else can live it for me. Creative living will stir up jealousy from some people but isn't being happy with ourselves part of living? In my opinion, transgender folks are often targeted because we choose to express who we are publicly. Is it easy? Not always? Are there risks? Definitely. Is being true to ourselves worth taking those risks? A resounding YES!

As a born again Christian I asked myself if my being transgender would affect my relationship with God? The answer He gave me was that he loved me as I was. He knew that I was transgender long before I was born. I think about the two greatest commandments Jesus gave: to love God with all my heart and to love my neighbor. My neighbor may hate my guts, may want to harm me but I am still to love him and to pray for him. Jesus loved the people who nailed him to the cross. I have no doubt that some became Christians because of His witness.

As my journey continues, I'm still that curious little boy who wonders where the road will lead. I don't know what I may find but I pray that I never turn back. I'll my walking stick and just keep moving forward.